Where it's at

I've developed a new theory. I think Silver Spring (a DC suburb for those non-Washingtonians) contains an abnormally high percentage of bold single men. Most of the men my friends have met and dated recently live in Silver Spring. NotCharlotte flirted with dating a craigslister from Silver Spring. NotCurly danced into the heart of a Silver Spring boy while partying at the Black Cat.

My own Silver Spring experience seems to confirm this theory. A couple of weeks ago I had a long meeting in Silver Spring and decided to walk up to the Avenue shops and grab something different for lunch (different from my usual McPherson Square environment). Anyway, I wandered around looking at my options and finally decided on Chick-fil-a. All of a sudden this guy walks up to me and is like, "Excuse me. I saw you walking down Georgia Avenue [now...at this time I thought he was going to tell me my skirt was ripped or something] and was so amazed that I had to make the block and come find you." Personally, I seriously question his vision. It was really hot that day, and I was (in my opinion) a hot mess. Anyway, he said he just had to give me his card and that he would like to take me out to dinner. I think I was shocked. I can't remember exactly what all sputtered out of my mouth, but I do know the entire interaction was no more than a couple of minutes. I thanked him and said I would email him that night, explaining that I'm an "email" person. You could tell he didn't believe for a second I would email him.

Ya'll don't know me that well, but I'm not big on meeting strangers. First impressions are hard for me and bonding with people upon first meeting them is difficult. I'm more a third impression kind of girl. That said, he was attractive enough and also seemed nervous...like this was something he didn't do all the time. I found that a bit endearing. Plus, his business card indicated he did film stuff (director and editor). I figure this gave us at least had one thing in common. So, I did what any e-savvy girl would do and googled him when I got home (and also looked at his website). What I saw intrigued me, and I appreciated his moxy. I decided to email, and after jumping through some scheduling loopholes, I have a date scheduled for this Friday with NotMoxy. I'll keep you posted. :-)

Limiting factors

Shouldn't there be a statute of limitations on our issues finally revealing themselves? I am the child of a divorce that left me essentially without a father. He split in the middle of the night when I was 5...didn't really visit...then died when I was 13. Yadda yadda yadda. I've been pretty up on most of the issues this has resulted in, but within the past year I have noticed yet another development.

I seem to have developed an interest in older men. I know this isn't all that unusual and that it's common for women to sometimes seek out their "father" in their dating life, but shouldn't this have manifested much earlier? To date, I have been more well known for my liaisons with younger men. However, within the past year, I have found myself flirting with men who have more silver hair on their head than not.

The latest manifestation of this has been my grandmother's occupational therapist. I met him last time I was in Texas and was immediately attracted to his sarcasm and motorcycle. I'm currently back in Texas for a two-week stint and was veritable wreck at my grandmother's therapy session today. I put on makeup (me...the girl who only wears makeup when she's going "out") and found myself giggling at his jokes. I would vacillate between this and trying not to focus on him because I felt so transparent. The true horror of the situation hit home when I heard my mom giggling along beside me.

Immediate thought: OMG. I am interested in the same guy my mom is.

Don't get me wrong. He's attractive...has tattoos...drives a Harley...is amazing with my grandmother...has amazing eyes. But (and this is a big 'but') he is also divorced and has a teenage son. He is definitely more in my mom's age ballpark than mine. Talk about a wake-up call.

Do I see myself changing? Probably not. I'm at a great age where both younger and older don't seem ridiculous. God, I love my early 30s. As long as they can keep up with me, then why not ;-)

what the fuck

Because really the title couldn't sum up this entire series of events better. NotTutorBoy is gone. He has completely disappeared from the face of the earth. You'll remember last Wednesday's chemistry experiment that had me risking extreme exhibitionism and him uttering "you're so fucking sexy." Things were good. I got out of his car with him talking about how he couldn't wait to see me on Saturday. Saturday was the promise of mad, hot sex. You'll also remember that he pursued me for almost two months before finally asking me out, and then we had to wait another three weeks for our schedules to mesh.

Why go to all of this trouble, giving absolutely no negative signs only to disappear like Houdini? Even if he was only in it for the sex*, he was pretty much guaranteed sex on Saturday, so why bail before the big payoff?

I email him on Friday to tell him about my plans for Saturday and tell him he needs to let me know when he wants to meet up. No response on Friday, but I'm not too worried. I figure we're all busy at work, right? Saturday rolls around, and I continued on with my plans for the day assuming he would call at some point. Nothing. Absofuckinglutely nothing. By Saturday evening I was at the bar with the girls and some other guys and definitely disappointed**. I leave a voicemail on Sunday evening to find out what has changed. No response. Nothing on Monday. Tuesday is tutoring day, and he doesn't show. Nothing. He has vanished, and I can't figure out why.

Ah well...not enough time to form a serious attachment. We've decided he must have died. Sucks for him.


*And for someone only in it for nookie, he sure worked really hard to get it and is definitely someone who could be getting it plenty of other places.

**We won't even get into the sexual frustration.

Drive fast, speed turns me on

Last night was date #2* with the new guy. NotTutorBoy** met me at the bookstore around 7, and I'll be damned if he didn't look good. We took off for the local pool hall where I promptly lost two games in a row. Sadly, despite my best efforts, my mind was so not on the pool game. The chemistry we share is pretty fucking undeniable. I'm not sure if it's meant to cloud the mind, and I really don't care. I can just say that 30 minutes into the date and my goal of keeping this date on the tame side had evaporated. All day had been spent overthinking and battling my internal demons, and in just few short minutes, I had clarity. Go with the flow and have fun won out over obsessive and have fun is exactly what I did.

There is a very bold, forward side to my personality, and she kind of took over last night. I get high tempting fate, living on the edge***. I must have been high on whatever that chemical is that fuels our sex drive because I bloody tap danced all over that edge last night. Road head barreling down I-66 as I accidentally kept slipping the car into neutral...pressed up against the car with the wind adding to the atmosphere...parked between school buses and witnessing what has to be the fastest leap from the back seat to the front seat all the while starting the car to avoid security...windows completely fogged over.

All of that and I still didn't have sex with him. He says I'm torturous. We're hanging out Saturday, and I think it's time to end the stand off ; )


*Yes, I'm calling it a date despite what you heathens might think!

**I figure he deserves a name. Thanks, NotCarrie. : )

***Hello...this is the girl who wants to live in Africa. Haha.

And the world's biggest cock tease award goes to...

So tonight’s date has been cancelled. He called last night when I got off because there was an emergency that popped up at work with a new project, and he is being flown to Maine this morning for meetings all weekend. Bust. He explains how disappointed he is. He then asks if I want to come over right now…share a drink. It was 1:00 am. I know what you’re thinking because I was thinking the same thing. Was this just a hook up? Was I sending the wrong message by going over there in the middle of the night? Screw it. I like this guy and was into the idea of some action. I took a deep breath and wrote down directions to his house.

(below is the series of emails I sent NotCarrie...much easier than trying to tell you the story any different way.)

I got there and refused to go inside until he told me he wasn't crazy. It was nice because we actually talked, and he didn't jump me right away. Also nice because we share similar viewpoints on life and interests. The second drink and he sits closer (I sat down first this time). All of a sudden, wham, he kisses me and we're making out on the couch. I become very aware that he has an erection and tell him I don't want to get him going too much...

...he's a good kisser and figured out pretty quickly I liked to be kissed on my neck. Anyway, he moves back into his personal space, and we talk some more. Pretty much the rest of the night is this push-pull thing of making out and me keeping him at bay from taking it further. We were in the kitchen and (blush) he pretty much puts me on the counter. I couldn't let that go on for long because it was too hott and would have went south fast....

When we're headed back to the couch after the kitchen he comes up behind me and pulls my hair a little. Also kind of hott. Am going to skip what he did next but, again, he was held at bay (too bad because it was really nice). I told him I needed to leave by 3, and he kept saying I needed to stay. I told him we weren't doing this tonight. Said what would he think of me. Seriously, I like this guy and didn’t want to be the easy lay. Maybe I am old-fashioned ; ) He gets all excited because he says he has the perfect song. He goes running off to his car to grab it, only to come back empty handed. He tells me it's this Andre 3000 song about the girl worrying what the guy would think and the guy thinking she just knew what she wanted, blah, blah. Anyway, his ploy to get me to stay.

He says I have to at least come up and see his quarters. I knew this was a bad idea but went anyway. What the hell. I like house tours. Anyway, he pushes me up against the wall and eventually the bed for more kissing. Only problem is that on the bed I can definitely feel a certain something wanting make a grand entrance. He was more persistent, and I'll admit harder to resist. Part of me was about to go for it. However, I didn't. I pushed him off and got up. Told him I had to leave and that it was hotter to leave him wanting. Hahahaha. I told him I wanted him to be hard all day today because he didn't get any. Yes, I'm a bitch. Poor guy could barely make it down the stairs. A few more requests to stay, and I made it out the door and home. We'll see if he calls ; )

Cradle to Grave

How young is too young in the world of dating? A hott* customer at my part-time job started chatting me up three or four weeks ago, and tonight, he finally got up the nerve to ask me out. Of course, I said yes (see footnote below), but he looks all of 23 or 24. In case you've forgotten or somehow missed the age post, I'm 31. Is a seven year age difference too much when it's the woman who's older?

For the moment, I've decided I don't care. He's hott and interested, and I don't actually know how old he is. Besides, it's just a date.


*nice, well-dressed, good looking....

A gentleman's game

Friday night was indeed date night seeing as I went on the date I won in the charity auction. Mine was kind of like cheating since it was with NotBeast, and it's not like we don't hang out or have a history already established. I didn't have to worry about butterflies or what he'd think of me when he finally saw me. Even deciding what to wear wasn't stressful, since he has probably seen me at my worst at some point. The only thing that had me a little worried was the fact that we can both be on the quiet side, and I would have really felt bad staring at him all through dinner. Our date, which consisted of Vietnamese food and Pan's Labyrinth, can be summed up by saying that he's a really sweet, thoughtful date. When I had to excuse myself during the movie, he made sure to ask if I was ok when I returned and then quickly caught me up on what I had missed. On dropping me off, he made sure to get out of the car and send me away with an amazing hug*.

Throughout the evening I was overcome with guilt because my mind kept wandering to my plans for Saturday night and the new person I was to be meeting. Whereas getting ready to go out with NotBeast was a nonissue in regard to nerves, preparing myself mentally to meet this new guy was the complete opposite. We had been engaging in this intense flirtation for the past several days and were finally going to meet. I started to get really nervous pretty early on Saturday, so I decided I needed a drink before heading out to calm my nerves. The upshot is that I had enough to drink that I'm not sure I could easily pick him out of a lineup if I saw him again. I'm probably being a bit overly dramatic. I'm sure I could spot him in a crowded room, but I was pretty drunk and don't recall the finer details of some of our conversation that night. He, too, turned out to be a true gentleman because when I pretty much offered myself up for the sacrificing, he refused and told me I was way too drunk. Lest I not take every opportunity to make an ass of myself, I made sure to send a snarky message on my way home. Really, people, keep me away from the alcohol when I'm nervous. I think just sucking it up and being nervous would be preferable.

Hopefully I get a second chance to make a better impression.


*I tried to get you ladies to bid on those arms!

Wine Not Whine (Date Recap)

Where are your auction date recaps, my friends? I have unofficially heard about two of them and have officially been on one myself. So while I can't repeat what I have been told in private conversation, I guess I will have to tell you about my own. Well, mine and NotCharlotte's since it occurred at the same time.

We, along with NotAGentleman met up the other night for what had been named the Date Extravaganza. While I was a little worried I would end up feeling like a chaperone (I'm four years older than the two of them), I was also excited for a night on the town with someone who admittedly likes the Gilmore Girls and has a hott picture next to a motorcycle somewhere out there. (Yes, two of the reasons I wanted to bid.)

For anyone looking for ideas of what to do on your own dates, I highly suggest modeling your evening after ours. We had everything from good food and wine to 80s dancing and liquor. I even enjoyed our times when we decided to walk from place to place. I love the cold weather and it gives more opportunities for talking as it can be a little more difficult when inside noisy restaurants and bars.

We even avoided doing too much of the dreaded small talk. It's nice when you can move right on into favorite childhood memories and favorites foods instead of politely asking of each other what is done each day between 9 and 5. *snore* It's not that I don't care (because I do, I like to hear about people's passions), but there is so much more than, "What do you do?" Maybe it was the booze, but I don't think anyone was very guarded on the date. It was like we let it all out, including making jokes about stds and singing while walking down the street.

So...a good date. NOW, WHAT ABOUT YOURS?!