Wednesday, May 09, 2007

No time like never

iTunes slipped a real downer into the party shuffle that was driving me through my work tasks. Concentration trained on the tasks at hand, I mentally screeched to a hault when India.Arie's I am ready for love* came on. I realized that, ready or not, I don't have time for love.

The muscle knotted between my shoulder blades and the red blood vessels always visibile in my eyes these days tell of work stress and long days and nights spent working two jobs. There are emails unsent to friends I've been planning to catch up with for months, sick family to worry about in other states, dreams of creative projects and new cities I'm too tired to pursue. I've scheduled and committed myself out of a certain kind of life.

How do you go into a relationship telling someone you can love them on Wednesdays and Fridays but are pretty busy the rest of the week?

Such an incredibly sad realization.

*No judging...it's actually a beautiful song.

6 comments:

NotCharlotte said...

I think there's always time for love...

if it's meant to be, it'll happen.

I know, I say that now when I don't even know myself if it's true. But I'd like to believe it...

Senor Beavis said...

Wow, it seems like forever since I've been able to relate to something on here, but that is exactly 100% my life right now. Between 2 jobs and standing commitments with friends, I don't even know when I'd go on a first date, much less anything past.

Chuckles said...

I can also ditto this sentiment. I have already had one stillborn relationship this spring and the two of us actually liked each other but couldn't find the time to explore anything. Even her boobs. I should just trade my balls in for a couch now.

Anonymous said...

NotCharlotte is right.

My girlfriend and I have very differeing and busy schedules. We just find time to be together.

Besides, sometimes a crammed schedule is manufactured subconsciously to avoid love. Do you really need all those little green pieces of paper? What good are they collecting in a vault somewhere when you've got no time to spend them...

For the first time since I was eligible for overtime, there will be a big, red "DECLINE" next to my name on the voluntary overtime list at work. :)

NotCarrie said...

He just needs to be a commuter,too:) Metro dates!

Anonymous said...

"If it's meant to be, it'll happen."

I submit to you that, based on your choice to lead a hectic lifestyle, it's not meant to be.

I'm single and very marketable, but I don't want to date a girl who only has time for me once a week. Or even twice.

That's not a relationship. That's friends with benefits.