I've come to the conclusion that if I'm not going to get married anytime soon, I should look into getting a wife. Now, before the feminists and misogynists and any other -ists I've forgotten, get all up in arms, know that I'm not looking specifically for someone female, rather, I'm looking for someone to fill that traditionally female-characterized role.
I didn't come to this end easily. However, the more I think about it, the more sense it makes. I work two jobs, have a somewhat thriving social circle (when I'm not hiding from it) and find that I have little, if any time to take care of things at home. Doing laundry, making my breakfast, lunch and dinner for the week.
This was made even more glaringly obvious when I spent the night over at NotDippy and NotANinja's home after viewing the cherry blossom's in DC. NotDippy writes and thus works from home and one of the last things she mentioned to me that night was that the coffeemaker was all set up and all that needed to happen was for me to plug it in the next morning and presto, I would have coffee. The next morning made this a moot point, since by the time I had rolled out of bed, put on my clothes and done my makeup, she had risen, turned on the pot and made me oatmeal (and none of that instant crap either). To which I told her I needed her as a wife and her response was to laugh.
I'm a believer in roles for people. While I would probably make awful housewife material (not a fan of cleaning, hate to do laundry, etc.), I make a great worker bee. Some people are suited to the role that I can't fulfill and I see no reason not to let people do the role they feel comfortable with.
I want to go to work and come home knowing that the house is clean, there is food on the table, clean underwear in my drawer and that I didn't have to spend an entire day doing this to get to that point. Someone else, who finds this type of work both satisfying and fulfilling did. I will in turn go to work and earn the money to keep the house clean and buy the groceries that will materialize into food and purchase the cleaning products that will be used to make my home worth living in.
Which brings me back to the present. I think I need a wife. While I am not particular about physical characteristics they must love housework and cooking and be able to provide color commentary when I bitch about the kids outside making noise again. Anybody takers?