Movie night was fairly successful. I sat next to NotElvis and I SWEAR he kept looking at me throughout the movie. I made him laugh with my comments, which were to interrupt the little shocked noises I made during the "scary" parts. There was minimal arm touching. The next day I found out that he had had a really good time and he was glad the movie was horrible, that way there was more chance to have said fun. A few days before the movie, he told one of my confidants "Yeah, NotCharlotte and I are going to the movies on Friday."
Hah.
This makes up for what I'm about to talk about.
About a week ago, before I was to depart on a (quite nice) trip, I had to work the late shift at my retail job. I was busily cleaning when this guy comes up and asks me about a travel book. He was cute, tall with dark curly hair below his ears and light brown skin. I didn't think much of him because frankly, he looked too young. So i show him the book. No problem, right?
Well, he comes up to me again and asks for something different. I help him find that, go on my way. He does this 3 more times. On his last perusal of my whereabouts he goes "I'm sorry to bother you again, but would you like to have lunch sometime?"
In my cynicism, the first thing I blurt out is "How old are you?" he replies "20." I go "oh. Are you in school or something?" and he gives the name of a preppy school in southern virginia. I sigh and look at him fumbling with his cell phone. "do you want my phone number or something? i'll go to lunch with you."
So i give him my digits and don't think much of it.
The NEXT DAY, around TEN IN THE MORNING. Guess who calls. Yep, it's him. I don't answer because i was in the shower at the time, but it's him asking me to lunch. I don't call back until Saturday evening, after a few short discussions with NotMiranda about what I should do with the situation. Quite honestly, I wasn't feeling it. So I changed "lunch" to "coffee." He doesn't answer so I leave a message.
He calls me back sometime between Sunday and Monday, but by then I have fully decided that I do not want to date this guy, regardless of his cute factor. So I don't answer my phone.
I also proceed to not answer my phone the next FIVE TIMES he calls me over the course of TWO DAYS. He didn't leave creepy messages, but they were full of indecisiveness and a lot of self consciousness.
I guess I could have taken the high road and answered the phone and let him off easily, but I'm not like that. I've been turned down so many times that I feel bad doing the same to someone else.
I don't need a boy. Like NotMiranda, I need a MAN. And definitely not a stalker...
21 comments:
Yay you for having a guy grow some long enough to ask you out.
Boo hiss that he's too young.
i don't know... i mean i realised that somehow i tend to like young guys. not to say that i only like young guys. then again 20 is kinda young... poor guy... he must have been pretty nervous...
He seems kind of desperate.
Awwwww. The poor kid. I can just see him fumbling around each time he walked up to you trying to have the nerve to ask you out and each time he chickened out so he' dhave to ask for your help. Awwww.
But I'm with you, if he's too young, then don't even bother. Plus he hasn't been around the block enough to understand that it is not ok to call a girl 20 times. He'll learn.
And you women wonder why guys are hesitant to ask you out? Who cares how old he is. He had the nerve to ask you out and you were interested, so GO!! Don't sit here and act like you were just too cool and he called too many times. He's eager...big deal...
NotSam: Yeah, i know right!
Jo: it wasn't so much of the age as his maturity level... i didn't get the "i'm an old soul at 20" vibe from him and I'm ready to move on from that point in my dating career...
anonymous: that's what i said!
linny: yeah i felt kinda bad about it... and he got mad props for asking me out.
i'm the kind of girl that dates for serious relationships and i knew just from his 55 phone calls that i wasn't into him.
nctrnl: eager would be calling me on friday, then that's it. stalker would be calling me as many times as he did, one call after the other. after the other.
besides, i think a guy would rather know at the start that the girl's not interested than her waiting until they've spent more time together to break it off...
You should have asked when he turns 21:)
Or 25. Cos really, how many boys are men by 21 anyway?
Notcarrie: I don't think he could have remembered his birthday, he just kept staring at his phone. the more i think about it, the badder i feel for him.
Vixen: i completely agree with you... it's like a magic dust will be sprinkled on them and all of a sudden they're mature!
Ahhh, it's always the young ones that end up stalking, isn't it? Or maybe it's not so much stalking as it is sulking.
I feel bad for the guy. You opened the door and even called him back. Being a guy I would have appreciated being let down honestly, even over voice mail.
And women wonder why guys have no clue with women. Over the course of a couple of days you went from lunch to coffee to no interest and he didn't even get to talk to you. Not that you shouldn't change your mind, just let us know when you do.
I'm with you on the whole "man" thing. When they're cute, that's good, but if they're lacking in the maturity department?! Ugh. That is soooo unattractive to me.
And the calling all the time without you calling him back?!
NEXT!
NotCharlotte I'm with you... I couldn't date someone I thought was 'too' young either. One call should be enough... not tons of follow-up calls to you not returning a call... that's one of the problems with dating 'kids' .. haha
Charise: my thoughts exactly!
Greenline: He freaked me out! What would you do if you had some chick calling you all the time without you even calling her back? Be honest. I won't even tease you for having the word "boy" in your name. :-)
Jordan: word. kids these days... ;-)
Well, I would be honest. I would answer their call or call back and say that I'm not interested in a blunt but nice way. I'm sure after that she wouldn't call again.
I think guys and girls can agree that a response, whether good or bad, is better than no response at all.
That's funny. The same thing happened to me when I was out with my friends. A guy approached me as we were leaving the club. He looked really young, but I just gave him my number and left. When he called he said that he was 19. I gasped. I dodged his calls for the rest of the week. He didn't seem to get the picture until he called and I told him I had company.
Case in Point:
I just got another call from him, he left a message and was like "Hey NotCharlotte, sorry I missed your call earlier, my phone has been acting weird lately."
WTF?!?
See, you should call him and let him down. This is just sad. You can call him when you know he won't answer and leave a message.
Otherwise, I don't want to hear any whiny post from you ladies about a guy who asked for your number and then never called. :)
Greenlineboy -
You should probably limit those comments strictly to NotCharlotte, since we are four very distinct women, and I, for one, would have handled the situation differently.
Greenline- last night i texted him and let him down gently.
this morning he wrote me back and said he completely understood and that i've got his number if i ever want to meet for coffee as just friends.
Happy now? The things i do for my blog readers ;-)
Notmiranda- don't make me talk about your situation.
Good job! You girls rock!
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