Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Put Into Words

Yesterday was one of the worst days I have had in quite awhile. I was on the verge of tears the entire day and almost asked to leave work early because everything was adding to my stress and causing me to want to scream. I know WHY I was in such a horrible mood but it's still stuff I can't even put into words. Not because it's difficult or painful, but because I honestly can not string together the correct verbs and nouns to explain how I was feeling and what sparked my mood. But as I accepted the fact that I couldn't clarify to myself what was going on, it upset me even more that as a result I would not be able to fix the problem. How do you say to someone that you are upset when it can't be that simple and 500 footnotes are needed to explain and clarify. "I miss you" on it's own is both too little and too much. "Why?" can either open a can of worms or elicit a disappointing and anticlimactic response.

In more lighthearted news, the situation with NotGraceful on Friday was so amusing I think I laughed more than I had in awhile. Having all clues point to me was a fun game for the evening but one I had to play with caution. I wouldn't want to come away from the situation with an air of deceitfulness as someone who plays around with matters of the heart. But I think I did a good job and merely filled a role yet kept the flirting to a minimum as to not act interested where I am not. However, I am now living vicariously through NotMiranda and can't wait for the exciting moment!

5 comments:

Larissa said...

aww perk up sweetie! we all have our days like this. this funk shall pass :-)

The Mad Dater said...

Wow, great blog. I just hopped over here from another blog and this blog has now been put on my "Must Bookmark this site, so that I can read the whole thing over the weekend - List"

The Mad Dater
"Because there's a Bastard in all of us"

NotCarrie said...

Thanks, Larissa...Today is already a lot better:) Still things that need to be fixed but at least I'm not crying, haha.

And thanks, Mad Dater, I look forward to checking out your blog:)

I-66 said...

I'm a tad confuzzled by all of this.

NotCarrie said...

Exactly, i-66! Me, too!