Sunday, June 08, 2008

The Best And Worst Of It

I keep getting invitations on Facebook to take those likeness quizzes, which are always about sex. Why is that, anyway?

It got me thinking, though. What is the worst thing to happen while having sex? Or, where is the best place to makeout? Or even, ways to get rid of a bad date.

So here are my thoughts on the matters at hand. Some are from the actual pages, but some I'm just saying on my own. And omg don't even try to think these things have necessarily happened to me. Please add your own thoughts in the comment section.

Worst Things To Happen While Having Sex:
  • Someone walks in (especially a relative).
  • Someone yells the wrong name (Just don't yell names, ok?)
  • Dog starts to hump, too. (This was on the FB one. OMG, I would die. That's disgusting.)
  • He turns out to be a she...or vice versa.
  • Someone has a gastrointestinal problem. (EW)
  • Fall off the bed and gets hurt.
  • Someone has to vomit.

Best Places To Makeout:

  • On a couch.
  • On a pier.
  • In a car.
  • Elevator
  • Pool/Ocean/Hot tub
  • Wait, where is it NOT good to makeout? As long as it's not excessively PDAish, right?

Ways To Get Rid Of A Bad Date:

  • Sick
  • Be honest
  • Change the clocks so it seems later.
  • Food poisoning

Ways To Be Turned On:

  • Slow, Intent Kissing
  • Porn (Not for this girl, though. No thank you.)
  • Back rub/Massage
  • Dirty Talk (This can so border on funny, though.)
  • Holding Hands
  • Alcohol

So...what do you have to add to the lists?

6 comments:

The Pussy Cat Bitch said...

First time here. Loooving the blog.:)

NotSamantha said...

Okay, here's something to add to the list of Bad Things that Happen while having sex:

Having a really talkative partner.

Roxy said...

Other ways to get rid of a bad date: 1. talk about yourself until there's no tomorrow

2. mention your carat requirement as 4 or higher.

The second one is my choice nowadays.

Anonymous said...

Some suggests me a very right place to make out - on a washing machine and a gym bent but i've never tried haha

NotCarrie said...

I like your thinking, Juicemag.

Anonymous said...

hahah I am laughing at the horrid things, but what I am laughing the most is I did have to vomit once and that just killed the whole mood ... what was a waste of a night and a sexy dress I might add lol