Between a mistake and a hard place

I ran into a mistake on Friday evening. As I was wandering through the exhibits at Artomatic with a group of friends and the current NotDarling, I caught my mistake strolling through my peripheral vision. The pace of my breathing increased, and my hands got all jittery and hyper. This was not the reaction of an excited girl, but rather the adrenalin of being faced with the inevitable. Despite it's size, Washington D.C. really is a small town, and mistakes can only be avoided for so long.

The mistake in question was a short, odd-looking fellow who fancied himself a mediocre photographer. He sought me out online via this blog (and I believe Flickr) and eventually took our relationship into weird text-sex territory. The burden is not entirely on my mistake. I readily went along for the exciting ride even though I knew he had a girlfriend, and even though I had begun dating someone else. He had a way with words, and I considered it harmless. Harmless turned into a few notes left in bookstores and the eventual discussion of when talk would end and action would replace it. After months of teasing, I decided to take my mistake up on his offer and meet him at his apartment for porn and sex. I have never before gone into a situation with only the basest of needs and no desire whatsoever to get to know or like the person I was meeting. Needless to say, this was not the makings of the best situation. To make a long story short, I did not fuck him. I think neither of us were what the other expected. We had each seen pictures, and I knew he was not what I would look for physically. However, the personality also did not match the person who had pursued me online either. The confident guy who talked of doing many, many things to me was really a shy giggler who would not shut up. He was overconfident in all the things he should not have been overconfident in. After about 30 minutes of listening to him, we both knew this was going nowhere. So, I left. Angry. The troops I had waiting in the wings swooped in for their extraction, and I learned a valuable lesson.

(1) This was not me. Not really. I felt guilt going in. I felt guilt while I was there. And, I felt guilt afterwards. (2) This was not the kind of guy I would ever associate with. It was just all a mistake.

All of my friends knew about the mistake, even NotDarling. Knowing I had told NotDarling about it, however, made Friday worse. There was no interaction between me and my mistake, but I knew NotDarling knew about it and was judging me. That, my friends, was hardest to take.

Totally Natural

I just can't write the salacious details I want...I'm sorry. I just can't. I guess mostly because the anonymity of this site is gone and while it's not my face accompanying these posts, it is no secret for some who I am and who the subjects of my posts would be about. And while I do share things with friends about my life, those aren't the only people who may read here. I would rather not give the details to those people I don't even like.

With that said...


The other night I was hanging out with two guy friends and before we commenced our beer drinking, they were playing music (guitar and drums). I enjoy watching people play even if it is difficult to not give my 'professional' opinion and want to jump in on an instrument of my own. It can be so eye opening to hang out with just guys sometimes, though. The testosterone that builds is so funny. Luckily, I am totally able to "be one of the guys" (while still being a lady and desirable, of course). I love to see them practically bump chests when they make a good joke, but then a split second later hold the door for me. Or how they give me the better beer or pour one of the darker ones into a glass so it will taste better. And meanwhile they're talking smack on the "dumb blonde" who works at the bar. I like that they can be themselves around me. I had a lot of guy friends in college and, while I love my chick friends, too, it's been nice to get closer to some guys lately.

But we'll never go shopping together. They just wouldn't understand!

Sex and the City - The Movie

You knew we'd mention it eventually! With the movie right around the corner, it gives us all a chance to relive the fun and drama we experienced with the series. I, personally, am looking for any chance to drool over Chris Noth. Despite the name and premise of this blog, we are not some weird fanatics. The series just provided such great eye candy (hello...the city...the fashion...the men) and a chance have someone else act out and analyze our issues.

Anyway, on to more important things...parties. What better way to enjoy the show than with a cosmo? After noticing the Austin Alamo Drafthouse was showing the movie complete with the cosmo experience, I decided that we (the Not girls) needed to find the right DC experience. What did I find? Absolutely nothing. No bars, no alternative theaters...DC seems to care about nothing but the upcoming election. However, if you live just about anywhere else in the U.S., someone is looking out for you. Just check out the special SATC premiere parties happening across the country...

• Party it up at Blu Sushi in Naples, Florida.
• The Centaur Bar in Detroit, Michigan is even raffling off a pair of Manolos.
• Bid on a pair of tickets to the NYC premiere. The proceeds benefit Oxfam (great organization, btw).
• In Dallas, even the big D has a party.
• Kansas City is celebrating Sex and the City passion party-style.
• I have a feeling the place to be and be seen with be the NYC premiere party on the 27th. Radio City Music Hall and MoMA. Holla.
• Columbus, Ohio is premiering the movie on the 27th and streaming the NYC premiere. Then head over the Bar of Modern Art on the 29t for a kickin' party.

So what are we doing? Well, I do believe we'll be settling into a nearby bar with cosmos and long islands prior to heading to the local midnight premiere. If you want to join us, drop a comment.

Share your love

Do you have a love story to share? Send yours to Camille Riley and participate in her latest project.

I don't know about you, but I love a good love story (but won't read your standard "romance" novel any longer). Also, want a bit of inspiration? Check out the amazing photography project called The Ones We Love. I'm trying to figure out what kind of portfolio I can put together, so they'll allow me to participate :-)

Nice guy syndrome

I just got my knickers in such a twist at work that I had to take a break and rant about it. Excuse me while I get up on my soapbox.

(clears throat)

I am TIRED of nice guys and the nice guy excuse! The nice guy who won't make the first move seems to be all I'm surrounded by. I am even going to remove myself and the boys who enthrall me from the equation. Let me just talk about the boy friends that I have and the women who are smitten with them. When will these men learn that being nice isn't an excuse for a lack of balls? Yes, we understand that you're afraid of rejection and lack confidence just like women, but has this become a pandemic? Are men putting their foot down and refusing to make the first move, preferring to remain single and celebate (with the exception of their hand)? You know what...I could even accept that. Lay down the law and say you're tired of bearing all of the burden of the chase. However, don't say that the reason you're single and can never find a girl is because you are too nice. Perhaps the reason you're single is because you need to grow a pair.

Ho’s before bros?

I used to think of myself as a diehard girlfriend. Down for any type of adventure and always up for the new and exciting. Especially, when it came to hanging out with my girls. Lately, however, I've been feeling none to friendly and even less inclined to do the new and tingly things with anyone including my girls. While the Nots have been out doing things with each other, I've been doing my thing over here, and trying to jumpstart my non-existent social calendar. This did get me to thinking about friendships and girlfriends and boyfriends.

Where does your friend stand while you're getting into a relationship?

There's no pause button on a friendship. And often times you may want to establish yourself in the relationship with your person before introducing them around to friends and sometimes family. Do you need to vett the new entry into your life to make sure they're capable of handling their own? And while I wish this was my problem its not, I don't have a significant other I'm trying to work into my regular life. I just have a lot of questions about what to do when I do.

NS

The living dead

Nah, we're not dead. Since we last left you, life has gone on. The girls persevere, and the stories get dished about over caffeine. I, personally, think the stories have gotten a lot more interesting. I'm hoping I get drunk and bored one night and write them all out here. A self-appointed, drunken historian.

I'm trying to get myself back in the hang of blogging here again, so pardon the brief synopsis. Life has been hectic. Boys have been only on my periphery lately as my mind has been occupied by my grandmother being really sick and finishing up a thesis.

I suppose this will have to suffice for a new beginning.