Monday, January 29, 2007

Different strokes

Have you ever wondered why conversations had while intoxicated are sometimes the most enlightening? I got tipsy on Saturday night in honor of NotCharlotte's birthday, and somewhere between the hours of 3:45 am and 6:00 am I got drunk. Pool having been played and the bar long closed, we settled onto NotSamantha's couches and continued a more laid back version of the party. What I recall of the conversation NotGraceful and I had blows my mind. Somehow we wound up on the topic on the female orgasm. I don't know how we got there, and I don't recall every word exchanged. What I do remember is that NotGraceful asserted the belief that all women required the exact same thing (i.e., method) to bring them to orgasm and that, if a woman didn't orgasm, it was her own fault. Things that came out of his mouth included something to the effect of there only being so much he could do. NotCharlotte says I got a bit heated at this point and began arguing vehemently that each woman was different and what works for one may not work on the next. I must have gotten some of my points across because toward the end he conceded (and I agreed with) that a woman should be up for helping a man figure out what to do.

Moral of the story: Women are not all the same, and simply going with standard operating procedure is not always good enough.

14 comments:

Senor Beavis said...

Apparently in addition to being a douchebag, he's also a moron. Wow, for as much as it sounds like he gets laid, that's freaking hilarious. And sad. What kind of submissives has he been nailing? (shakes head).

Guys, this is one situation where unless you're psychic, we should ALWAYS ask directions, regardless of how guys hate asking directions. Everybody wins.

Anonymous said...

I agree!!! All women are not the same - but if we lend a helping hand then that'll benefit all parties involved! hehe

I must say though, sometimes it's hard for me to have "that conversation" with someone. Know what I mean????

Beamtendave said...

If a girl isn't vocal it can sometimes be hard to find the right moves. She doesn't (or shouldn't) have to draw a road map, but some well placed moans and affirmatives are handy signposts.

Anonymous said...

First of all I am impressed you remembered that conversation. I never recall drunk convos... prolly a bad thing.

Second, you're absolutely correct. He's a douche.

NotCharlotte said...

This post cracks me up because i remember it occurring and trying to get you to stop talking about it. You were so peeved! haha

D-baggggg.

also, for further reference: he and i did NOT bone.

Anonymous said...

NotGraceful sounds lazy and insecure. What idiot (whoever wants to get laid) argues that it's a woman's fault if she doesn't come with him? It probably would have been easier if he had just said, "Hey, I'm lazy and bad and bed and I like to blame the woman." I'm all for helping a guy out, but only if he's Notdouchebag.

Anonymous said...

when it comes to women there's no such thing as a standard operating procedure
you have to treat each as a seperate identity, although if they are willing to help out that makes things much more fun!
yeah some things work from person to person, the generic basis, but it's not always the case and a lot of fun can be had by finding what makes the woman tick.
and just because it worked for someone in their past doesn't mean that it'll work for them when the next man tries it though

NotMiranda said...

Senor Beavis - You're definitely racking up the points!

carmensincity - Definitely know what you mean! Maybe beamtendave has the right idea for those less *ahem* vocal.

Churlita - Loves it!

Px - Amen!

LMNt said...

Wow. He doesn't get laid much, does he?

NotCarrie said...

I can understand not knowing or being naive about it all, but to not come* around or be open to new information is not cool.



*ha, sorry. NO pun intended.

Chuckles said...

Standard operating procedure is just the starting point. You pay attention to her and then adjust accordingly.

Paying attention helps in so many areas of life. Areas like thighs, chests, necks, ears, lips and so on. Besides, she's freaking naked, how can you not want to explore every bit?

NotCarrie said...

Someone needs to throw some cold water out into the comment pool.

Jordan said...

agree... we are not all wired the same

Harleyblue said...

Amen! Alcohol always brings about the most interesting conversations.