Wednesday, May 03, 2006

A Well Hung Pharaoh

Have you ever seen a better headline than, "King Tut's Penis Rediscovered"? And it's not only one of the greatest headlines ever but the article is a stand out piece of work too.

"At first look, Burton's pictures may seem to indicate that King Tut could have been a little better endowed. But according to mummy expert Eduard Egarter Vigl, the pharaoh was normally built."

First of all, Poor King Tut is totally blushing in the afterlife at this embarassment of his endowment size being guessed to be merely normal. King Tut was a total stud, I'm sure, back in the day c. 1333 B.C. and now he's being compared to Otzi, the IceMan who is described as having, "an almost invisible member" due to mummification and dehydration.

"All was normal in King Tut. The penis is a highly vascularized organ and shrinks when it is mummified. Actually, King Tut has been flattered by the embalmers' work. There is no comparison with Ötzi's penis," Egarter told Discovery News."

OK, so sure, there's no comparison with IceMan but as the stud he was and mummifiably is (haha, I made up a word?), he deserves better!

So I, NotCarrie, am starting new slang. "My boyfriend is a total King Tut" is now the equivalent to, "Hot Damn, my boyfriend, Clive Owen, is a total man-beast in the bedroom!"

(Although I'd never, ever say something like that outloud. I like to respect Clive's privacy)


Vixen said...

LOL, you crack me up. How dare you try and steal my boyfriend!!!


jo said...

haha! clive owen is a hottie!

Kellie said...

Poor King Tut. No respect.

Sweet said...

King 'Tiny' Tut? ;-)

chelsea said...

My favourite headline went with a story about some birds building a nest on a factory window overnight. Pretty average article but the headline made it a killer: Four Kestrels Manouvre in the Dark.

Genius, especially if you happen to like Liverpuddlian bands from the 70s.

annie said...

And if he's circumcised, you can say he's a Cut Tut.