When The Sun Rises

And what was maybe the best response to "Please stay" at 6am:


"But I'm a classy lady and I have to be home before the sun rises."


Of course, while smiling demurely...

Bar Tabs

Going to bars where one knows the bartender usually results in some hooking up, whether with extra strong drinks or cheaper tabs. Well, when I got my tab for $23 after almost four hours of drinking, I was beyond ecstatic for the hooking up that had ensued. Fast forward to the next day when NotGraceful and I realized that our tabs had gotten switched and he had unknowingly paid not only for a few of my drinks, but for the two I bought for him. Ooops! I was pretty d-runk, though, so it's okay.

Man, Friday was so much fun that we're still talking about it! The other day my one guy friend texted me, "Sorry we couldn't makeout. That's always the highlight of seeing you" (he has a girlfriend now) and then my other guy friend texted, "When are we partying again?" (hottest guy ever.)

Anyway, so continuing from some of what NotMiranda wrote about, here is what I was up to Friday night at the same bar. She is right about my random conversation about bra-size, but what she forgot to mention was my even more random conversation with NotShorty about numbers of orgasms and when a guy has done enough and can be selfish. I am not sure where this came from (Oh wait, maybe the shooter, jack and coke and jeger bomb.)

Once back at my house, where the others had a restroom pit stop, I did indeed lay down in my yard and order NotGraceful to steamroll me. I know what you're thinking- in your front yard?! It was the middle of the night, though, and I'm a slut, I guess. Because when I want to get steamrolled, I get it. NotGraceful must have been new to the act, though, because his skills were a bit awkward and I kept yelling out, "NotBear does it better!" and "Call NotBear! Get him over here!"

Oh, maybe you're wondering what steamrolling is. Well, any number of people lay down on their backs and take their pants off. No wait, kidding about the pants part. Pants stay on! Then one person (the steamroller) proceeds to roll across the people on the ground just like a steamroller would. It's a lot of fun. I promise. NotGraceful needs to work on it, though. He got an "A" for effort, but his execution was a "B-" at best.

I, unfortunately, wasn't there for the events that followed with NotCharlotte, NotMiranda, and NotGraceful as I was home asleep...or drunk emailing/texting/IMing...so my night ended with me asleep in my bed still wearing my jeans. I'll let one of the others continue their part of the story.

On why I love Fridays and friends

Ready to kick off a long weekend at our favorite bar, NotCarrie, NotCharlotte and I grabbed NotGraceful and headed down to Fredericksburg to meet up with a couple of NotCarrie’s other Not characters and imbibe in the ambiance of Spirits.

The stresses of the previous week melted away as we took advantage of $2 kamikazes and began sipping that first Jack & Coke. As is typical for Spirits, you stand around long enough and a random assortment of characters find their way to you. NotShorty (we’re talking 6’8’’ here, people) adopted our group early on. Finally, being the oldest in our group got me something as NotShorty swore he was at least 10 years older than everyone present. Shocked I was 31, I smiled as I took the drink as my prize.

Several drinks later, our flirt-o-meters were off the charts and the conversation (and night) took a turn for the interesting. Why don’t we do this “choose your own adventure” style? Which Friday night shenanigan do you want to read about?

- NotGraceful claimed you couldn’t get a hickie from biting, so I proved him wrong*.
- I turn around and NotCarrie had somehow wound up in a conversation that involved guessing what her cup size is.
- Me winding up tipsy enough to end up with my tongue in NotShorty’s mouth in the middle of the bar but not drunk enough to take him up on the ride home from his place the next morning.
- NotCarrie explaining to NotGraceful what steamrolling is in her front yard.
- Sticking my head out the window barreling down I-66 while kissing on the outside of the car.
- Losing both my flip flops and my cell phone as I attempted to ford a river.
- Strip poker until 5 am in the morning.

And that’s just my evening. Curious?


*Poor guy is still wearing a bandaid to work ; )

A Sign Of Times To Come

We finally had a gathering where the male to female ration was closer to 1:1!


HOOOORRAAYYYY!!!!!!


I was looking at pictures from Friday's party when I realized that in one of the group shots there are four females and....get this...FOUR MALES*! You may remember my recent complaint about the cooter fest that our social group has become. Well, I think this is a good sign of times to come.

*There were more than 8 people there. I'm just using one photographical representation of the evening for my highly scientific statistical research.